Hey ladies!!! The guys have officially entered the chat! A few weeks back, we posted something that a lot of women were thinking, but couldn’t quite find the words to say. Over here at High On Beignets, we love the fellas too and we don’t discriminate. I believe there’s a lesson to be learned in everything, so to level out the playing field, I reached out to a few guys to set the record straight on how they really feel. Ladies, I know we feel like we know it all, especially as it pertains to sex & how the male brain operates, but these men are clearing up a few common misconceptions as it relates to sex & what they want. Sisters, grab a pen! The men are teaching today’s session.
Misconception: Guys love sloppy head.
Now personally, I think we see these images in porno’s and feel like we have to live up to the hype, but this guy wanted to set the record straight on the subject.
“Every woman don’t have to try and give head like SupaHead. They need to make love to the dick. SLOW TF DOWN AND NO TEETH. We hate that shit.” -ShadMuzik 32, New Orleans, LA
Misconception: Guys love talking about their sexual experiences with each other.
At some point or another, we’ve all had the fear of being exposed by someone we’ve been intimate with. Whether it was something as simple as telling their friends they smashed or our nudes getting leaked. I think this thought has attributed to a lot of females trust issues. Hopefully this guy’s response will ease your mind a little.
“Folks aren’t just in the locker room talking about what their girl does or doesn’t do… Sex is too personal and too deep a subject to discuss willy nilly. Even bravado conversations, which do happen in locker rooms (shorty swallowed everything; her neighbors down the street heard her; she put it on me, man…etc.) are rooted in the seeking of peer approval or heraldry for conquest. Which again, is validation. But those things don’t ever involve education. Like understanding her anatomy, erotic cues, erogenous zones, different strokes for different folks, reading responses, pre-sex, foreplay…..none of that comes from guys talking.” -A. 34 New Orleans, LA
Misconception: Men like to always be in control.
Being that males are the more dominant sex, it’s safe to assume that they all like being in control all the time, right? Wrong! Here’s what these guys think of men always being in control.
“It’s okay to get nasty and not be judged. Just let loose. Men love an aggressive woman who just gone grab the dick if she want it. A lady in the streets but a freak in the sheets.” -Tee 31 New Orleans, LA
“We want our women to be aggressive when it comes to sex. Initiate it, knock the controller out my hand and start giving me head. Let me know you want it. Don’t be shy; go all out and be my little freak/porn star. Take full advantage of me, it’s yours so come get it.” -Sean 35, New Orleans, LA
Misconception: Men have the same obligations as women in the bedroom.
We had to discuss this one in depth because I had a bit of a difference in opinion, but after it was all said and done, this guy was able to convince me to see things from his point of view.
“In most cases, women just have to show up. Men on the other hand, you have to have the right size, right stroke, last a certain amount of time, change positions at the right time and hell, even read minds. I don’t feel like women are under that same type of pressure to perform. It’s like show up and be wet lol.” -Tebah 32, Phoenix, AZ
Misconception: Men should just KNOW what to do.
This may be the most important, because across the board, it’s one that all the men agreed on. Here’s what this guy wants ladies to know. Especially those who are in committed relationships.
“Great communication kills any misconceptions in a relationship and more importantly in the bedroom. Great communication is being open and unbiased with one another. Be open to really listen to your significant other and be even more open to speaking to your significant other about what you really want and most importantly, what you need. Discuss sex drives, mood killers, things you love and things you hate etc. So often we think we will “hurt their feelings,” and if we do that, we’ll begin to dampen down our intimacy. Can you image a life long spouse with dampened down intimacy, all because we walk on egg shells when we discuss OUR SEX? If a man or woman’s ego is that big where he or she can’t discuss how to better their sex, the issue is bigger than sex.” -Robert 32, New Orleans, LA
Now of course every man is different and their views don’t reflect the views of all men, but I’m sure we can all appreciate the transparency. Hopefully, the ladies are walking away from this with a new understanding and ready to take it up a notch. Fellas, if we missed anything, chime in in the comments. I’d love to hear from you.